I Once Thought...

Undercover Teapot

This teapot is called a Brown Betty according to the 3 Volume Phaidon Design Classics books.  I have found a way to improve on its simplicity and homey elegance.  I keep the contents warm with this toque.  Others no doubt have come across this innovation but not many have blogged about it I'll bet. 

What is the Big Idea of career counselling?

I believe that acceptance, hope and meaningful living are the most fundamental human needs that we deal with in career counselling.  The construct that ties hope and meaning together for us and allows us to articulate our sense of belonging is identity. Traditionally career counsellors are seen as facilitators for the individual finding a fit in the labour market. Facilitating the smooth operation of the labour market is what has allowed the career counselling to exist in the first place. Presently, the actual work of helping people to hope and find meaning is not seen as a public good but a private one that is sporadically available through communities or family or more recently through counselling.  As a career counsellor, I need to ensure that there is an genuine foundation in human need in the work I do.  In my view this comes from ensuring that my client feels she/he belongs in ways that can elicit hope, meaning and identity while participating in the functioning of society.

Pergolafield

A pergola, arbor or arbour is a structure forming a shaded walkway, passageway or sitting area of vertical posts or pillars that usually support cross-beams and a sturdy open lattice often upon which woody vines are trained. (wikipedia)

And a field of pergolas or arbors might be an arborfield.  And it is in such a place that I was raised.  Well, on the periphery of such a place.

My own words.

As I play then work; feel then love; so am I constructed.

Successful Failures is a Myth for Most

Handler, the ideas guy on CBC writes an article about Steve Jobs and the myth of successful failures.  Jobs has been quoted as saying that his being fired from Apple was one of the best things that happened to his career.  http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/story/2011/10/11/f-vp-handler.html

The more some ideas get repeated the more true they seem to be even though most people's day to day life may not support the concept.  So myths are born and live on sometimes for much too long.  I'm not saying that myths are wrong just not very reliable source for truth as we experience it in everyday life.  It may be that nothing fails like failure.  But then that is another myth.

Passionate may not be Kool!

Another career counsellor started a debate about the use or overuse of the word "passionate" among our ilk.  It was like a mallet hitting a gong.  I cringe when I hear that word.  No wonder there are so many great jokes starting "My career counsellor told me...." I've searched in my own mind for an alternative that might capture something would be a more meaningful word or phrase.  It may be that we are ready for a new idea to guide career counselling rather than simply settling on a substitute word that just continues our established line of thinking.  So what might the new word be?

Tuning Machines are 6 for $20

 I started to learn guitar after Eric gave me a used guitar and introduced me to an online instructional program.  Yesterday when practicing "ka chunkas" I found the g string wouldn't stay in tune at all.  I decided it was the string tightening mechanism.  I looked up "guitar string tuning" on the web and found what these things are called and how to replace them.   The site author suggested purchasing a package of 6 and replacing all of them because altogether it would only cost about $50 US.  I went to an unusually busy music store today and bought 6 machines for much less than that. 

Since I diagnosed the problem yesterday, I was surprised at how urgent I felt the absence of a tuneable g string because it meant I didn't have my guitar time.   Funny how attached I have become.

Dog, Barge Operator and a Load of Hay

I watched a small barge being loaded at French Creek Marina.  When I saw the dog watching the barge operator watch the load of hay, I knew I had to release the shutter.  The scene seemed familiar,  moving these small bales a 100 at a time on a trailer, but it was strange to realize that they were traveling over the Salish Sea in a barge.  The dog just looks like every farm dog I ever saw.

Planting an Apple Tree

Our lot has good drainage.  The soil is likely compatible but the trees need 6-8 hours of daylight to thrive.  A gardening pro suggests checking  for sunlight on the summer and winter solstice then locate your plantings accordingly.  Today is September 21. I have studied the yard for sun and shade and I think I know what the hours of sunlight will be between the spring and fall equinox?  It is not the same thing as the solstice but it might do.
Using these calculations, the sloping backyard has about 3 square meters with the correct hours of sunlight.  It is occupied by two 10 meter birch trees and 4 rhododendrons.   Privileged locations.  Can we find a place for all the backyard inhabitants and still squeeze in the apple tree?  Probably not without a significant redesign of the yard.

So I am thinking,  the back yard is like my "self".  This self is a space that  is occupied by a hierarchy of beliefs, ideas and feelings.   Now insert a newcomer, like lets say a new idea that requires a commitment of time and money.  This new commitment will make everything in my self space confusing.  If this insertion happens unexpectedly so that I cannot prepare a plan to readjust the bits in the self,  I will feel threatened and vulnerable.  If I can prune and purge in anticipation of the new idea, I am likely to be less tense.

The yard will be changed even though the sunlight still falls in the same place and the legal boundaries don't move.  So do the garden and yard remain the same?  Or maybe it is a matter of quantity of change and recognition.  Maybe cutting out the rhodos and planting a dwarf apple tree will not make the yard unrecognizable.

Does this mean my sense of self seems to be continuous because the boundaries stay in place even though the hierarchy and the kind of bits have changed irrevocably?  What happens when the edges of my self are threatened?

What Kind of Thought is a Useless Memory?

 In one of my memory compartments I am still waking up before 6 am to go running in the predawn morning though I haven't done this for 15 years.  Someone is saying "Hurry Dad, I've got to get to the soccer game!"  Comes from the same place. "Get the phone someone! Please!"  These little urgent messages get stuck in one of my memory circuits like foreboding nursery rhymes.  Maybe they just want some attention because they have no purpose except maybe to divert me from the useful memories like turning off the element on the stove.   

Discovery Islands Intoxication

We travelled to Quadra Island yesterday for a little exploring.  This is the first time we have been in the Discovery Islands. We travelled through the interior of Quadra by road which is mostly wooded.  What I really wanted was to have the beauty of the forest on one side and the spectacle of the seascape on the other side.  The advantage is that this would give me a continuously unfolding panorama where I am able to fix the points of the mountains or the points of land in the ocean as well as the shapes and shade of the trees into a clear sense of place.  In spite of this, or because of this tree tunnel travel, I saw the mountainous archipelago from different view points and then knit the places in between together in my memory and in my imagination.  This gave me an internal map of sorts.  Then I checked an actual map and compared what I believed I saw with the technically correct version.  It is amazing how the map came to life when I did this.  The printed map took on inspiring dimensions.  I now look at the map and I am intoxicated with possibilities for water travel in the straights, inlets, narrows and passages.

I wonder if the printed map would have had the same effect if I hadn't had the snapshot perspectives of the ocean through the tree tunnels?

Manic Islands Fever

It is September and we have lots of sun and the sky is clear.  The croplands on the prairies are getting good weather as well and industrial agriculture churns forward.  My own cover crop of fall rye is doing well in front of our house.
On the beach this morning we had a modest cool breeze.  I have a burning drive to see many places in the area as the summer winds down.

I am hopping all around my mind wondering what I should do next.   I simply have too many activities to choose from all of which are feasible.  It is like the shopping aisle that has 12 kinds of detergent.  I am overloaded.  The prospect of working on one straightforward project would be welcome right now.

Surrealists and Lasqueti Island

 First let me say that I have not felt like I belong where I live.  This is in part because I am not familiar with the landscape, flora and sea scape around me.  Too few memories to bond with.

I have done  2 things recently that seem to have had a settling effect on me.  I visited Lasqueti Island and I saw an art show on the surrealists at the Vancouver Art Gallery.  I like to talk about both experiences.  The events resonate with something that fits with my identity.  Why is this so?

I will have some things to think about.

Business Partners

Normed Testing in Counselling Diatribe

Here is a statement of one of my guiding principles in my counselling practice.   If you want to be entertained, don't bother reading it.  If you are curious about what counsellors obsess about, this is one item that you can put your collection.   If you want to know more about testing in counsellling, this may be the nugget you've lived for.

 I have an admitted bias against quantifying soft psychological constructs in the counselling process. I feel that quantifying parts of a person, for example interests, can raise barriers to integration of identity and locus of control. It is for this reason that I feel ambivalent. Although it may seem like a minor distinction, this is not the same as a bias against the tools themselves. I use the tools often because most clients I see espouse value in getting this feedback. Sometimes the tool fills a desire for a concrete outcome such as a written report, and sometimes we are convinced that the tool simply is the best source of information to help inform a decision about livelihood. I want to believe that the client and I work with whatever motivations he/she comes with, not whatever method I have least ambivalence. Most clients I see indicate an interest in a "test" at some point. While I do use the the tools I most concerned  whether he or she has a critical perspective when the client leaves with the results.

In spite of my concern about locus of control and integration of identity, most people who do normed vocational tests find that she or he is affirmed which I'm thinking is about as far away from disintegrated identity as you can get.

Progressions.

Broken Corrugation

Broke

 Loss of trust in the economic order and the loss of hope that you can find your way into a productive role can easily lead to a sense of helplessness. If depression becomes embedded in one's mood then investing time and effort on career becomes problematic. Having a career/job/employment isn't best therapy at this point. Treating the underlying issues of depression become essential. My thesis research suggests that some people have a transcendent experience or they acquire a new view on life when everything seems this hopeless. Getting stuck in the hopelessness or confounding this natural grieving process with sedation, electronic diversions, a premature career hop or unhealthy relationships keeps the personal transformation from happening. When someone who is experiencing long term unemployment becomes mentally ill, planning a career may give a focus to "getting normal" but it should not be the main focus of a helping relationship. At least, this is my view. 

Sacking

The sacking of Rome was a big deal.  A whole culture and infrastructure went down like gravity on a clear day.
Now people are sacked  although I don't know anyone who uses the term.  I can imagine people saying "I've been redundicated." "  I've been down sized from the upside." "I was fired"  " I have been kicked through the goal posts of life."  But here is some advice that comes to us from the CBC as a sidebar on an article that seems to feature journalist stories of revenge for sackings. It's called "Taking the Sack"  and is based on an interview with workplace consultant Linda Allan.  During the sacking she advises things like:

Keep calm:
Don't say anything:
Take the information:
Thank them:
Cool off:
Be honest: (but don't say anything)
Lose the anger: (but don't do anything that may come back and bite you.)

The advice is fine if you are score really well on the Barron Emotional IQ test or are a reclusive high performance monk but then you wouldn't be in this situation if you where.   This isn't likely what I'd likely be thinking or doing.  I'd be thinking more about how will I manage to cope with the bashing I'm getting over the the next few hours then the next few days.   Even though Allan isn't likely intending to say it, I'm left with the message "Whatever you do, don't acknowledge what is happening to you to anyone else." or  "Stuff it into a sack and chuck it into the basement." 

Feels like a receipt for mental illness.  Lets call it "sacking."

Corrosion and abrasion

We have two decks that where built with the original house.  At one point the former owners lifted some of the deck boards and flipped them over because they were badly discoloured.  Apparently, this staining is a result of a small organism known as mildew.  Mildew thrives on wet and low light.  The underside of our top deck seemed to be an ideal home for these introverted fungi.
The recommended way to get rid of mildew is to burn the wood or corrode its environment.  Both are harsh methods.  Hauling and burning would leave us with a 2.5 meter airy space where only gravity could be at play.  Corrosion involves applying diluted chlorine then blasting the black residue off the wood with pressurized water.  This is called power washing.

Last year I asked a neighbour why they chose to power wash their walk and driveway.   I had heard about power washing and was prepared to do without the expense if it was a just cosmetic thing like pulling dandelions and cutting grass.

Mildew burrowed into my psyche this winter though.  The season was wet and sunless like I have never experienced before so I did ruminate on sanitation and sanity a few times during the rains.  This week, I was ready for a harsh correction to my situation.   I corroded the underside of the deck 3 times then watered the black with a power washer.  When water comes out of a small hole at one ton per square inch it can do some damage to water loving fungus gardens.   It can also lighten my mood.  I know the solution is only temporary.  The mildew life force will patiently wait out corrosion and ultraviolet radiation.  And still I'm not sure that the mildew is even a bad thing.

Knobs and Insights

  I'm in the kitchen and the white cabinet doors are all around me.  I reach up to open the door in front of me.  I put my fingers on the cabinet knob and as I move to pull the door open, the knob stays in my hand and door doesn't move.  I study the end of the knob that should be connected to the door.  I look at the metal stud that sticks out from where the knob used to be.  I test the likelihood of reconnecting the knob to the door.  Nope, it is not a matter of twisting or jamming it back on,  it is not going to reconnect.  After opening the door with my fingers on the tiny stud and pulling out the tea pot, and here's the best part,  I put the knob back on the stud and leave it there while I toss some tea bags into the pot.  There is the knob waiting for another time when it can spring a full load of disappointment onto me or Sheila or whichever guest decides they want a cuppa.

New shot...I am in the kitchen with white doors, several of them now have tiny metal studs instead of knobs.  I open the cabinet door by pulling on the tiny metal stud and pull out the tea pot.

 Here's the thing.  Its always a surprise when one of these knobs comes off in your hand even when you know you had just slipped it back in place a moment ago in a tiny effort to fool entropy.  It has potential to be a lab for measuring memory and procrastination. For example, how many times do you pull the stupid knobs off the doors before your replace them; 10 times on ten incompetent knobs? 20 pulls on 1 knob and one time on 9 knobs?  Is everybody different in their futile knob pulling behaviour?  I wonder....

This year of knob pulling has been instructive when I think of it as a metaphor.  We moved into the house a year ago which was when we disconnected from my employment in Regina to create a nest on Nature Island. In the metaphor the knob failures and the disappointments and surprises where little instructions to let go.  Resettling has not been settling in real life.  For me it have been sort of emotionally storm tossed, in part because I still feel bound to my old roles of provider and facilitator of human insights.  I know the knobs don't have inherent intelligence and God didn't intend the knobs to give me a lesson but I was able to use the knob fiasco to some advantage.   I saw myself in a mind- movie that helped me understand loss of connection.  It was both funny and sad.

This week we have new knobs on the kitchen cabinets.  They are functional and unobtrusive.  They don't make a statement but they will do the job until we find the knobs of our dreams and if our dreams don't materialize, there may be a lesson in that as well.

Living lite.

The paint on my brush smells faintly like clay.

This morning I heard a bird call I didn't know.

Retirement is an everyday occurrence.

 But more quiet overall.

Progressions.

Today is a long weekend for me.  It must have started many months ago but  I have been so busy trying to doing things I want to do before I die that I needed to take a break.  So I am taking a long weekend.

Working at a paid job gave me a foundation on which to predict life's progression.  I was able to punctuate my structured "on the job" time with unstructured time like long weekends.  Pay gave me a way to measure advancement as I counted credits.  My paid work time was organized, in the service of someone else, either a client  or the employer who paid the wage.  Living inside my paid work world meant that I didn't have sole  responsibility for how I would plan to expend time.  On rare weekends I longed for work to start again on Monday because I felt lost without the even flow of time and accumulation. 

 When I've been unemployed I grieved my lost spaces and my markers in the world.   I remember these times as exhausting efforts to get back onto the jerky platform of a job so  I could re-start my accumulation of  credits, so I could eventually do stuff I really wanted to do at a future point in my life.  Through this nest of beliefs my life's progress was deferred. 

Now I am relatively well off  for latitude as to how I watch the progression of time.  I have arrived at that future point, sort of.  I am insecure about our future but I'm not racing to get back onto the old cart.   I am spending my time in a more wholesome way than I did in those dark days on pogey.   I am divesting my economic value.  I don't have a job description nor a crescendo of ecstasy.  Meanwhile, time is twisting and warping like a column of smoke on a cool damp evening.   More and more I whisper to myself and listen to the sounds the whispers make. 

SOS counsellors meeting last night

Wonderful warm people to meet with.  I got a lot of encouragement to keep the career coaches project moving ahead.  I also now have expanded my network to include 7 new practitioners.
I'm now considering  a community based education project which might include anyone who may be an important influence in young people's lives not just parents.  This might include community mentors,  elders, grandparents as well as parents.  Thinking of a series of educational events with speakers, encouraging an ongoing group of interested adults to help plan other events and champion youth/career employment.  I need to go back over the thesis on Parents as Career Coaches for ideas.  This thesis may also be a good door opener for meeting with people in the schools or VIU.